A Letter Unsent

2006-12-21T09:48:00.000-08:00

Days like today, I just love the quality of light out here in the Pacific Northwest. I walked out my door to sepia and bluish tones washing everything in sight. It was lovely.

2006-07-14T11:46:00.000-07:00

Some days I wish I could shrink. Become just small enough that I could hide behind my computer under my desk. I tried that today. Hiding under my desk. Sadly, I am too large.

2006-07-03T11:05:00.000-07:00

steph-and-ryan.com

Sure, I'll still use this blog, but I need to break in the other one, too. Samantha made enough fun of me over the weekend that I made sure to post over there...

Are you all happy now? (warning, dream post. very boring)

2006-06-20T13:04:00.000-07:00

I had a weird dream last night. All I remember was that R, a girl I didn't recognize, but understood to be my friend and I were at a party and this girl and R pressured me into doing a candy flip (So weird considering R's feelings toward mind altering substances!) I sat on a couch feeling artificial for what seemed like 5 minutes and then the feeling passed. After that artificially good feeling left me, I went and searched high and low for a bathroom. I would get frustrated because I'd wait in a long line only to step out of line to speak with someone for a moment (or stay in line and speak with someone for a moment) and I would see someone's shoes walking into the the john before me when it was my turn every. single. time.

I came back from my seemingly hours long search to find that girl and R laying on the couch with her head on his shoulder, which was innocent enough considering that I knew that they did not have any romantic feelings for one another. But at the time I was frustrated from my search to find an unoccupied toilet. I woke up having to pee and, in my half awake state, getting more and more upset thinking that it was awfully inapproprate for two friends to be so familiar with one another after consuming extacy. I, understandably, was not in a very good mood when I woke up this morning.

2006-05-30T13:53:00.000-07:00

I hate the days that make me question what it is I do and why the hell I wanted to do it in the first place.

Things

2006-04-14T12:19:00.000-07:00

I've been sick (due to a nasty, nasty cold) for the last two weeks and have sort of used my illness as an excuse for eating whatever the hell I've wanted. Sugar cookie with pink cream cheese frosting? Gimme. Chicken Teriyaki? Yes, please. Fruit and vegetables? Pssht. Don't waste my time. For whatever reason, I still feel crappy. Note to self: Eating better=feeling better. Stop eating crap.
I am going to start sharing my office full time with someone at work. This means no Fridays by myself. While I like my new officemate, I am beyond sad about this. I mean, he'll always be here. Always. This means no doing those things that you do when you're alone that would never admit to doing in someone else's presence. (burping, farting, the occasional nose pick).
I've been reading all of the materials on theknot.com and thenest.com a lot lately. It seems to me that getting married and having weddings is just a dream world, whereas being a "newlywed" is like getting a big, fat dose of reality. And I find myself more infatuated with the reality as opposed to the dream. Yes, I want a big party and a pouffy white dress, but the more I read, the more I just want to BE married. I mean we already act like it.
But more and more, I find myself wishing that I could be more of a housewife. I know that all my femenist peeps out there are gasping in horror, but what it comes down to is that feminism is all about having a choice about what a woman wants to do with her time. Does she want to work, or does she want to stay home with and run a household? But we've swung too far in the opposite direction. I wouldn't know what it's like to run a household since R and I depend on the money I make. More and more in our society people cannot live comfortably unless they live in a dual income household. And I'm beginning to think that's sad.

2006-03-15T11:00:00.000-08:00

And but so, there has been a bit of family strife going on over here at the R&S household. All R's family.

Sadly, R's uncle died last Thursday after a tragic house explosion over the weekend. I know what you're thinking "House explosion?? WHAT THE FUCK?" And let me tell you, I thought the exact same thing. The weird part is, R's uncle didn't have any gas appliances in his house, and while he did have cancer, he wasn't on oxygen or anything. Investigators can't even investigate anything because the house burned to the ground.

Needless to say, the memorial service for him is on Saturday, so R is flying out today to be with his family right now. I'm sad about this for a number of reasons. Let me list them from most noble to most shallow:

1. I can't be with R and his family at this time (a) because we couldn't afford two plane tickets right now since they're so expensive. I mean you get a bereavement fare, but 50% off of an almost $900 plane ticket is still $450. Ouch. (b) (This one should really go in the "shallow" category, but whatever) I didn't want to give up the vacation time since I need to save up every hour I can save up for wedding related business. I mean, I only get two weeks per year, people.

2. Our apartment is kind of scary when R isn't there. It's an old house so my imagination tends to kick into high gear, and every floor creak is a ghost and every window rattle is someone trying to break into my apartment. Quite irrational.

3. R's birthday is on Sunday, and I can't be with him for it, because he will be home.

So I have booked myself up for the week so that I'm not sitting at home alone wallowing in my own loneliness, binge eating. Tonight is Maggi! Tomorrow night is shopping with the girls from work! Friday is St. Patricks Day and I'm getting wasted with the girls from work! Getting really drunk is a great way to waste two days, since you have the day of getting drunk and the day of recovery! And I think Sunday will be a nice low key day of cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. I'm totally buying myself flowers.

Aaahh! And tomorrow will be a better day!

2006-02-21T21:02:00.000-08:00

Today kicked my ass in thirty thousand different sorts of ways. I don't know what the hell was up with it. I think it may have been the fact that I wasn't even supposed to be in the office today ("I'm not even supposed to be here today!"), and then when I did, it seemed like everyone needed something. I spent all day on tech stuff and there was a scare involving a client and two other law firms. Things always seem to go wrong when you get more than two law firms involoved.

I don't know what it was about today, but I walked out of work feeling completely broken and battered.

BUT! Tomorrow will be a better day! No day could leave me feeling as crappy as today did!

Hike of doom

2006-02-20T10:51:00.000-08:00

Mountains scaled: 1
Miles hiked yesterday: approximately 5.5
Blisters on my feet: 2 huge honkin ones on each of my toes
Gorgeous views experienced: 2
Legs in pain today: 4 (2 of R's, 2 of mine)

Pounds lost (even though this has little to do with my hike): 2!

Anecdotes!

2006-02-14T21:27:00.000-08:00

1.
Last night, while I walked home from the gym, it started raining (like it is wont to do in Seattle) and hailing (which it is not so wont to do in Seattle). As I walked, I could feel my nose begin to run. By the time I got home, my nose was a snotty mess despite my best efforts to sniff it all back up. I got home and R got me a tissue. I blew my nose, kissed him, and then walked away.
All of a sudden, from the other room, I hear "eww! EWW!" And I'm all, "What??"
R says, "Nothing."
I say, "What is it?"
R then says, "Nothing" and starts rubbing his upper lip. A light dawns in my head. There was still a little snot on my upper lip when he kissed me.
This is probably the grossest story ever (that doesn't involve poop).

2.
Items bought at our local drug store this evening:
A lock
Rubber gloves
condoms
light bulbs

FYI

2006-02-08T16:40:00.000-08:00

Just so you know, locking your key in your locker at the gym and standing around in a towel for two hours waiting for the person with the bolt cutters to come and cut the lock off of said locker is NOT a good way to start the morning.

Just a heads up. In case you were wondering.

Indulge me.

2006-02-03T13:32:00.000-08:00

My blog and I are like two ships passing in the night. That is, if one of the ships was constantly avoiding the other ship. Maybe this is a bad analogy. Sometimes I check my blog, as though I were not the person responsible for it, and think to myself "that asshole hasn't updated her blog in, like, forever."

Wednesday night R, Samantha and I went to the Boat show. (note to you all: In this context "Boat" is a band, not a seafaring vessel.) It was awesome. This show has solidified my crush on D. Crane, the lead singer. He does this really cute head swager thing that makes me melt. He also has this really charming smile when he's not on stage. After the show R and I had to buy another copy of their LP, since we mailed our previous copy to Falcone in PA, and here is a sampling of our conversation:
D Crane: You should check out our LP, it's really cool.
R: Yeah! We sent our old copy back east to one of our friends, so now we need a new copy!
Me: Yeah!
D Crane: Awesome!
Me: So your next show is on February 24, right?
D Crane: Yeah!
Me: (whispering drunkenly): Cause that's my birthday!
D Crane: Awesome! Maybe we'll make you cupcakes or something! But you should e-mail us!
Me: Okay!
*Deep Breaths* Ok, so it may not look like it to you, but I had to get that out before I e-mailed and got all stupid fan girly. I think I'll be ok now.

Yesterday I was one big ball of migraney horribleness. I went home at around noon an passed out. Note to self: Do not stay up for nineteen hours straight and think you're going to be A-OK for work the next day. You are not eighteen anymore. Hell, you couldn't do that when you were eighteen.

Before I curled up into a throbbing ball o'headache, I read this article on Yahoo!.
Dear Media,
Why are you always trying to commute politics onto the Court? Those who sit in judgement tie their decisions to either a law or the Constitution. If that law is incongruous with the Constitution, than that law is unconstitutional. Justices' decisions are not based upon a party platform. Do we need to send you back to ninth grade Government class?

Also, Ninjas are all the rage nowadays. I wonder what it is about them? I mean, before it was zombies, then pirates, now ninjas.

2006-01-26T20:27:00.000-08:00

Quick note, my dudes.

If you feel like you were ripped from the womb when you graduated from college and are currently a cubicle monkey for some boring corporate whore of a company, if you long for the intellectual stimulation of yore, when people talked about things besides budgets and summary judgement motions, look no further!

itunes.stanford.edu !

You can sit in on the very same lectures that those privelaged jerks are taking advantage of right now. That lecture on constitutionalism and democracy? Some punk just slept through that class and paid a butt load of money to do it. You get to experience it FOR FREE through the miracle that is Apple!

** note: If you do not have iTunes, you will need to download it listen to these lectures. Seriously, though, it's worth it. I swear.

no title

2006-01-16T18:47:00.000-08:00

A. Chili powder + salt + tatertots = AWESOMENESS.

B. What with all the rain, our "parking spot" is all muddy. (our parking spot is actually the lawn. Although, we should re-name the lawn "the mud pit." That's what it really is. There' s no grass there anymore. Tre lame.) I drove to work today, and didn't park on the boards R laid down on the lawn (Cause I can never guage it right). Now R is SERIOUSLY. PISSED. OFF. Seriously. I have never seen him so angry. Not at me (I don't think), but mre at the car because it's stuck in the mud. Rockin.

C. In light of the above, I'm just gonna drink some wine. Wine is good. If R would just come in, I'd hand him a beer. Alas, no. He is determined.
.
.
.
D. Update! Now, a mere three hours later, the car is out of the mud! Mad props go out to my co-worker and her boyfriend, who are coming over tomorrow night for some wine! (We invited them to stay tonight, but we're all pretty muddy.)

Hey!

2006-01-04T14:44:00.000-08:00

Hey! Hey innernet!

Guess what!

I'm getting married!!

Why am I doing this again?

2005-12-05T11:11:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, as a futilely wrapped packages and generally stood around at my second job, I wondered to myself "Why in the hell am I subjecting myself to this sort of torture." I thought to myself:
- "Is it the money?" Well, no. This job is only paying me $8/hour and I only work one 8 hour shift per week. Which ends up being a whopping 50 bucks, so it definitely isn't the money.
- "Is it the discount?" I looked around at all of the crap they sell at that store, and it's all really, really nice, but even with the discount it's still a bit spendy. In all reality, I could finish my Xmas shopping at Target and still get more for my money. So no, it isn't the discount.
- "Is it because I'm a big pussy pushover who only accepted the position of stupid stupid giftwrapper because, to a lesser extent, I got to pick my own schedule, but to a greater extent, just because the manager called me???" Ding! I think we have a winner, folks!

Every one there is brainwashed. No. I take that back. They are not brainwashed, they are just a different sort of person. They are cheerleaders, while I am that person in the corner making fun of the cheerleaders. I walked in, and it was just like "We like to SELL THINGS!! And HAVE FUN DOING IT!!! WOOO [insert name of store here] TEAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I just cannot handle that anymore. And there I am, standing there by the table, doing NOTHING because no one was prepared to have someone there that didn't know how to do anything else but wrap things. So all I could think about was how just being there was a supreme waste of time.

The worst part? I have two more Sundays of this crap. They better have something for me to do, or I swear, I'm going home. I came to the conclusion that I don't mind being there if I actually have something to do. But if I'm going to stand around, then fuck that shit. I'll be out.

Priceless

2005-11-30T11:12:00.000-08:00

Food Consumed: 52698.25 lbs. (approximately)
Dishes broken: 2
Bottles of wine drank: 5

Visits from out of town college friends: Priceless
(Your college friends leaving so you can finally do it in your own apartment again: Also priceless)

And now, a look into my relationship...

2005-11-15T10:35:00.000-08:00

R and I have taken up painting. Together. We are now that couple. You know, the one that makes you gag. What follows is a conversation that we had at an incredibly hip bar. While we were solving battleship logic puzzles. (We're also that couple. You know, incredibly dorky and bordering on socially inept. I say bordering, cause we do have some friends.)

R: Man, I love doin this kind of stuff! Beer and puzzles!
Me: Seriously!
R: This is what we should paint!
Me: What?
R: Yeah! We should do a series of paintings as a tribute to all of these dorky things that we love! Like crossword puzzles, Battleship logic puzzles and sudoku! (Japenese number puzzle for the incredibly hip nerd)
Me: R, you do realize that everything we paint will be a grid, right?

Cue dissolution into a puddle of giggles.

sigh

2005-11-14T20:29:00.000-08:00

Long weekends are never long enough.

I got nothin else.

2005-11-09T15:04:00.000-08:00

Today I accidently tucked my shirt into my underwear. I don't neccessarily know what that says about me, but I thought you all should know.

Scare Tactics

2005-11-01T16:09:00.000-08:00

Senator Bill Frist today said of Harry Reid's decision to shut down the Senate:

"'Once again, it shows the Democrats use scare tactics," he complained, sounding as impotent and frustrated as Reid had the day before. "They have no conviction. They have no principles. They have no ideas. But this is the ultimate. Since I've been majority leader, I'll have to say, not with the previous Democratic leader or the current Democratic leader have ever I been slapped in the face with such an affront to the leadership of this grand institution.'"

I just love how Frist tries to cheapen this symbolic gesture by calling it a "scare tactic." It's not a "scare tactic!" All it is, is the Democratic leadership finally fighting back. Maybe a bit dirtily, but fighting back, nonetheless. And I have a feeling that Republicans are pissed because Reid shifted the stage from Alito and the Avian flu* (yet another political tool to frighten the American people into looking the other way), back to the White House's lies.

* Yesterday I was watching some newsmagazine (I couldn't tell you which one, they're all the same. People looking concerned and nodding their heads while pretending to ask "hard hitting" questions), and this reporter deeply intoned "Thousands of people could DIE!" And then this woman came on the air and started talking about turning stadiums into makeshift hospitals cramming people in there like sausages. And then the reporter peppered his report with so many "if's" and threw out so many large numbers (211,000 people could die! During the influenza epidemic in the early 20th century, over half a million people DIED!!) that I just wanted to throw something at my television.

2005-11-01T13:25:00.000-08:00

So. You know how most office buildings that rent out space have a lot of freestanding walls that aren't attached to ceilings? Well, I'm just sitting here, listening to the chatter of my neighbors (all I can hear is a Peanuts-style "wah wah wahwah") throught the crack in the ceiling and all of a sudden, it occurs to me. If I can hear their idle chatter, I wonder if they can hear my loud belching???

2005-10-14T09:19:00.000-07:00

I don't know what's going on with the world today, but it seems like everyone is experienceing huge personal losses. Maggi, The Yarn Harlot. It just makes me feel so sad and awkward. I mean, what can you say, or do to comfort someone in such a time? So instead I'll just say nothing and keep them in my thoughts.

I think I'm gonna go call my mom....

"There's nothing like a magnum of champagne and a fountain to put you right again."

2005-10-12T11:26:00.000-07:00

And but so, as is usual in the fall-time, what with the shrinking of the days, and the staying indoors more and such, I've been feeling off kilter as of late. It's enough to make me wonder when I ever was on-kilter (if at all). But I'm slowly adjusting to the changing of the seasons and have begun feeling like something approaching normal. You all may come talk to me now; I won't bite (anymore). I have to say, I hate feeling like that. I tend to do and think things with a bit more of a malicious edge, and it's horrible to spend your time thinking like that. I'm glad I'm pretty much through it.

There's nothing like 3 pitchers of beer and hanging out at your friend's house while she reads you poetry to put you right again.

Really quick

2005-09-28T17:42:00.000-07:00

ha!

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2005/9/28pendarvis.html

"A bold gesture in the name of love"

2005-09-27T14:26:00.000-07:00

Am I a tool? A loser? A wimp? Mildly retarded?

Maybe. But I'm goin back back back back. To Philly Philly Philly Philly.

I leave tomorrow night and will be back on Sunday. See you all on the flipside.

I hate the airport.

2005-09-23T23:43:00.000-07:00

No matter how much they dim the lights, it always feels like an over-exposed picture. I think it's the smell.

R left for his brother's wedding in PA tonight. I'm ashamed to admit how upset I was that he left me for home. I felt a little better knowing that it upset him just as much to leave me. I feel like a bit of a shit now for giving him such a hard time about leaving the entire week leading up to his flight, but I really didn't want him to go, and I really don't want to be alone. It comes down to this: I can fill my days with activities, be they with friends, or solo, but my nights endlessly stretch before me. No one will be waiting for me when I get home from work. There's no one to cuddle with on the couch, or make fun of me for watching stupid shows. There's no one to snuggle with right before I go to sleep. For the first time in my life, I am totally alone. I've been by myself before, but people I wanted to talk to or hang out with were accessible. My mom was a room away. My best friend, a call away. But now, I am adrift. It's the first time I've ever felt homesick.

I was sorry I couldn't go home with R, and not totally for the reasons you might think. Yeah, I would have liked to have seen my friends and family. I would have liked to have been present at his brother's wedding (I love weddings [aside: I almost wrote "weedings"]). And I didn't want to be apart from R for nine days straight. Mostly though, I'm just sorry that I'm not there to hold his hand as his plane takes off, knowing how much he hates flying.

(p.s. My blogiversary gift to you: toothpastefordinner.com. Know it. Love it.)

2005-09-23T16:37:00.000-07:00

Happy Blogiversary to me!

It's like, ebay, but for all things handmade!

2005-09-21T15:40:00.000-07:00

Seriously. I don't do this whole soliciting thing, but etsy.com is awesome if you're looking for something special that made from someone's VERY OWN TWO HANDS.

Spread the word

And now, a look into ~eve~'s emails....

2005-09-19T15:54:00.000-07:00

me: So... cha thinkin about?

Phaedre: I'm thinking:
"Oh my god, I NEED to get to a TV with cable in time for the nip/tuck season premier tomorrow. NEED."
you?

me: I'm thinking:
"Do I want to go to the gym right after work like a good person, or do I just want to lay on my couch with my knitting?"
Right now it's the gym, but I'm betting in a half hour it'll be the couch.

Phaedre: ~eve~, you are a good person whether you go to the gym or to your couch. You just have to choose whether you want to be a good person covered in sweat, or a good person covered in yarn.

(I think we all know what I'll be doing tonight!)

2005-09-16T15:28:00.000-07:00

It's hard to be appropriately vague and telling all in the same entry. This is what happens here. I want to tell you everything and nothing. I want to let you in, but at the same time only tell you what you want to hear. No one wants to listen to me whine, least of all me. So pardon me if I haven't written in awhile.

It's not you, it's me.

(Suffice it to say, I've been feeling less than fabulous lately.)

2005-09-06T12:57:00.000-07:00

Dear Falafel sandwhich from Zaina's,

You were worth killing the entire lunch hour just to get you and come back. Scarfing you down in ten minutes was my biggest pleasure of the day.

Oooooh yeah.

love,
me

Side note: It's a shame that we all need to stuff our faces during our often too short lunch hours in our rush rush culture.

"Who's Gonna Document these Days?"

2005-08-31T12:50:00.000-07:00

I walked down the waterfront today. The tide was out and the air smelled like ocean. I suppose all of that stuff that’s left on the rocks oxidize in the air and make everything smell like a fish market. I sat outside and read my book as the sun stung my eyes and looked out at the beautiful water and was unable to be touched by it.

I walked back from the park with the wind blowing my hair in my face. A small gum wrapper walked beside me.

I knew then I would be unable to capture that moment.

Get off my ass.

2005-08-30T08:58:00.000-07:00

iTunes eight-ball!
Put your iTunes on random, then ask it each question before going to the next song. [Stolen shamelessly from Tara, then Samantha]

What do you think of me, iTunes?
Slow Hands - Interpol (Woah there buddy! I'm taken!)

Will I have a happy life?
Walk on the Ocean - Toad the Wet Sprocket (Great, my life will be melancholy and people will forget all about me. Fabulous.)

What do my friends really think of me?
Opera Singer - Cake (I mean really, I know I have a fabulous voice and all... But come on!)

Do people secretly lust after me?
Suckerpunch - The Refreshments (hmm... guess not.)

How can I make myself happy?
Temptation - Moby (Heh.)

What should I do with my life?
C'mon C'mon - The Von Bondies

Why must life be so full of pain?
You'll See - Rent Original Soundtrack (Ooo...Portentious.)

How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Take off Your Cool - Andre 3000 and Norah Jones (Yeah... yeah.[hot damn!])

Will I ever have (more) children?
Pawn Shoppe Heart - The Von Bondies (Guess not.)

Will I die happy?
It's the End of the World - R.E.M (If not happy, then at least fine.)

Can you give me some advice?
Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps - Cake (Dammit, iTunes! That's not a real answer!)

What do you think happiness is?
Tickets Sold Out - Ludacris (Not that I even listen to Luda, everytime one of his songs comes on I skip it, but I suppose it's appropriate.)

What's my favorite fetish?
Take You on a Cruise - Interpol (Hot Damn!)

(A real entry. Someday. Now leave me alone.)

resisting the urge to type in all caps

2005-08-23T13:24:00.000-07:00

Dear Waitress at the diner I frequent on occasion during the lunch hour,

I have been a waitress before; therefore, I am sympathetic to the job that you do.

However.

It is absolutely unacceptable to make us wait 10-15 minutes to put our order in during the lunch hour. It is absolutely unacceptable to make us wait 30 minutes after we put our order in for our food. During the lunch hour. (I mean really, it does not take 30 minutes to make two omelets.) It is absolutely unacceptable that I had to walk out of your diner to the Subway across the street so that I could get some (expletive deleted) food in my stomach and get back to work on time. It is absolutely unacceptable that I had to scarf down a sandwich at my desk because you can't get your shit together and serve all three of the tables that were your responsibility.

That will be all.

(blog entry, plus pictures, regarding the move coming soon. Just waiting for our internet connection at home.)

(Also, I just spell checked my blog entry, and it seems as though the word "blog" and "blogger" is not in the blogger dictionary. Huh.)

We've moving!

2005-08-20T10:03:00.000-07:00

Just to let you all know, we will be sans internet connection starting today, until Tuesday. If you need to get in touch with me, you'll have to *shudder* actually call me. (on my cellphone)

*breathes heavy* are this room getting smaller??

*breathes into a paper bag*

*passes out*

2005-08-15T09:22:00.000-07:00

Every now and again, I find myself thinking back to the time when I had to pull the peices of myself back together again. When I mourned that peice would never come back. That time where I went to bookstores to find comfort in watching people aquire things for their loved ones during the hustle and bustle of the holdiay season. When the people I loved were with someone elses. When I was so sad that I thought my heart would break a thousand times over.

And in a way, I think that it's good for me to remember the horrible place I was, and the people I ended up hurting (either directly or indirectly) to get where I am now. It keeps me grounded. Makes me not want to fuck this whole thing up.

It's just too good.

My mother is a saint.

2005-08-11T09:08:00.000-07:00

Do you see that yarn over there?? (click on it to see it at the right resolution) My mother bought that for me. She is officially supporting my habit. At least, I think that's the one she got for me. Either way, my mom, buying me yarn is AWESOME.

Also, I think she finished her first sock last night. Mad props to my mom!!!

2005-08-09T17:46:00.000-07:00

After using the facilities at my apartment, I put toothpaste on my hands as opposed to soap when I was washing my hands.

I suppose I wanted them to be minty fresh for the ballgame tonight?

(oh yeah, we're going to a ballgame, woot! Boss gave me tickets. Yay boss!)

2005-08-08T17:12:00.000-07:00

Although I haven't been knitting much (too damn hot, although it's cooling down), the fact that knitpicks has new yarns gives me palpitations. I just want to buy it all so I can touch it and love it!!

Must. Restrain. Self. From. Buying. More. Yarn.

...

Knitting, fools

2005-08-07T19:32:00.000-07:00

So yeah. It's too hot to knit. So here's a picture of my current WIPs. Also, Maggi and I went to see Stephanie Pearl-McPhee. She was totally funny, but not funny enough to be clutching your stomach-gasping for air. In short, all the other knitters in the room totally killed my buzz, ya know? It didn't help that the room was small , HOT and cramped. Ugh.

Anyways. Too hot to blog. Later.

2005-08-03T21:47:00.000-07:00

Also, if you ever want to see two women orgasm over chocolate, come with Maggi and me to The Melting Pot where we shall gorge ourselves on half-priced fondus for happy hour.

Seriously. Two pots of fondu, a beer, and an iced tea for twenty-five (25) bucks! Can't beat it!

(Can you tell I've been revising too many legal documents?)

2005-08-03T12:03:00.000-07:00

I'm wearing brown underwear with grey pants today. For some reason this really bugs me. I don't like to mix my nuetrals.

Also, we found an apartment, and are moving on August 18. woot.

Also, we've been going to lots of shows. Just so you know, The Gossip rocks, so does Scarlet Room.

Operation: Extend the Weekend

2005-07-25T14:20:00.000-07:00

All in all, I'd say it was a gorgeous, exhausting weekend. Quick recap:

Friday: Went to The Zoo (dive bar around Samantha's) and drank too much beer. Befriended a drummer and promised that we'd check out his band on Monday night. That is, after we check out the first band we're going to see.

Saturday: Nursing a hangover, Samantha and I went to knitting. After that we went to Bite of Seattle where we ate delicious piroshkys and corn on the cob and listened to the Caesars on the grass in the sun. I lost my ring and was very, very sad. (very)

Sunday: We went on an emergency Extend the Weekend expidition to the Pacific Ocean. R, in his infinte wisdom exclaimed, "Finally! I'll have peed in both the oceans!" We drove around a lot. Found a beach on an Indian Reservation that was 15 kabillion times better then the beaches we had access too (or so R tells us. He was the only one willing to climb down the cliff. Samantha was in flip flops, and I was concerned for her safety.) We ate delicious chicken fried steak at a tiny bar where they sold Gizzards and Shrimp Cocktail as appetizers. We parked on the beach and froze as we watched the sun go down. It was a fabulous day.

Of course, I'm exhausted today, but really, it was well worth it.

Let's do it again sometime, kids.

Pardon my departure....

2005-07-19T12:45:00.000-07:00

I was listening to two local journalists speak to a dutch man at a local coffee shop this morning. They were speaking about terrorism, the intelligence community, and what it would really take for terrorists to shake us up. Which I suppose is appropriate, given the international climate after the London bombings.

One of the things one of these journalists was telling this Dutch man was that we do not have an American identity. At the very least, not the way the Dutch have a Dutch identity. And I believe this man was wrong in some respects. I understand what this journalist meant; he meant that Americans do not have an identity tied to race and ethnicity. If I asked any schoolchild when I was in elementary school what they were, I would hear people tell me that they were part Irish or part Italian. If you go to any shore town in New Jersey, they all sell shirts with things like "Everybody loves the Irish" and "Kiss me; I'm Italian." But just because our identity is not tied to ethnicity, this does not mean that we don't have an identity. I mean, there's no way that we could have spent a hundred and fifty years in relative isolation and not have developed a sense of who we are as a country.

Personally, I tend to think that the American identity is tied to consumerism and our government, be you for or against those things.

I guess this just begs the question, what does it mean to be an American?

"Mark, this music is the glue of the world!"

2005-07-17T15:52:00.000-07:00

- Some days I am amazed at how fast time flies. Just a year ago I started College. 6 months ago? I was working in a deli. 3 months ago? Moved to Seattle. Two weeks ago? Becki was here. Yesterday? My parents were here. It's disconcerting that just when you want time to move fast it moves like molassas. When you want it to slow down, it gains velocity.

- I finished my socks! They are fabulous and quite possibly the best things I've ever put on my feet. I may never go back. (I'd post a picture, but they're in the laundry right now.) It makes me with I could knit full time. Anyone want to go into business?

- I went to the Harry Potter party on Friday night. It was interesting to see all the kids with nothing better to do get all dressed up (and I don't neccessarily mean in costume). I mean, what else are fifteen year old kids going to do? Also, I finished the damn book at 8 last night. I know I said I wanted to prolong the pleasure, but man, I just couldn't stop myself. So Samantha? Whenever you're ready.

- I'm watching Empire Records. Whatever happened to my ideals?

- Also, reading her makes me want to be a better writer. *hugs*

2005-07-13T07:30:00.000-07:00

Last night the cat tried to edge me out of my chair. I was finishing my scarf, and she jumped onto my chest, then she sat in the tiny, tiny area my ass was not occupying. Then I moved and she consumed an even larger part of the chair. It was cute.

I came up with a pattern idea for a sweater and a sweater vest yesterday. I'd tell you all about it, but there is a possibility that I might submit it to knitty.

What is it about summer that makes us stop writing? Are we all just too busy? Are we basking in the (nonexistant) sun?

2005-07-07T11:14:00.000-07:00

What a sad day in London.

But kudos to you for doing what we couldn't. Move on.

2005-07-05T22:48:00.000-07:00

Embarassing Moment #25603

2005-07-02T19:43:00.000-07:00

You wanna know what's one of the most embarassing things evar?

Just as you finish having sex, your parents knock on the door as you're cuddling naked with your sweetie.

Oh, how red my face was...

2005-06-28T17:15:00.000-07:00

There was a guy outside singing. He didn't know the words, but the tune to "Jesus Christ Superstar" is still stuck in my head.

More to come, kids....

Updates plus food pr0n

2005-06-19T16:47:00.000-07:00

Hey kids, I know we haven't spoken in awhile, but it seems as though life has exploded and I'm still trying to clean it up...

New job:
Last week I started my new job! So exciting and so scary at the same time. Aside from all of the normal jitters of trying to get the hang of a new job, I also had to train my replacement. And man, is that ever frustrating! I mean, you're already stressed about trying to figure out this new stuff, and then this other person just isn't doing the job the way you did it! And WHY WON'T SHE DO IT THE WAY I TOLD HER TO?!?! But I've since calmed down about it and have let the new girl do her job. There's always a learning curve, right? right? That and I got a handle on what I was doing, so I was less stressed about what she was doing.

Knitting news:
So I was about, oh, six inches up the front of R's sweater, when I realized that i had dropped a couple of stitches . So annoying. So I tried to insert a lifeline so I could rip back, and because the yarn was so dark, I had trouble seeing where the row was. (Do you see where this is going?) In a fit of frustration and annoyance, I ripped the whole thing out. Six inches. All that time. Wasted.

In happier news, I've made sock progress! Here's a picture of the sock right before I turned the heel:

Lookit me. I am one fine sock. Or, er, half a sock.

I've since, turned the heel, picked up stitches, and started shaping the gusset. I am a sock maniac! I've decided that I really like knitting socks. They're portable, and relatively cheap to make. Well, compared to knitting a sweater of afghan. I saw some Koigu KPPM at the yarn store for eleven bucks a skein. And well, you need two skeins. That's one expensive pair of socks.

Food pr0n.
Oh man. I made scones today.

I am so delicious and crumbly!

Eat yer heart out! No, seriously!

This is me, writing down the BEST SCONE RECIPE EVAR. Well, granted, they were a bit sweet, so I think next time I make them I'll cut the sugar to a quarter cup instead of a third of a cup, but still. It's totally a keeper. Seriously guys, I ate two of them right away while they were still hot and OH EM GEE!! I won't keep you guys waiting for the recipe anymore:

Scones

2 C Flour
1/3 C Sugar (I'll probably only use 1/4 C next time)
2 tsp. Baking Powder
1/8 Salt
1/3 C chilled butter
1 egg, beaten
1 tsp. vanilla

1/2 C heavy whipping cream (I substituted fat free half and half for this. It tastes fine, but the batter is a little thinner without it.)

Combine Flour, sugar, baking powder and salt. Cut butter in small pieces and combine with flour mixture. The mixture should be crumbly. Combine egg, vanilla, and cream in a smaller bowl. Add to flour mixture and stir till combined. (Do not over mix). Put on floured surface and gently knead (since my batter/dough was a little on the thin side, I just kneaded it in the bowl). Flatten into 7 in circle about 1 in. deep and cut into eight triangles (I just put mine in a cake pan and seperated it out into eight sections). Bake at 375 degrees for 15-20 min. Eat and enjoy!

And here, a gratuitous picture of the kitty:

Just look at those bedroom eyes!

2005-06-14T11:38:00.000-07:00

Hey guys,

Work is frustrating and I could use a beer.

Seriously, at some point I will write an entry with actual content, I swear I'll have something worth saying relatively soon...

2005-06-09T11:18:00.000-07:00

Dear me,
You look hot today. I would do you.

Love,
me

Dear JCPenney,
I've said it before, but I heart your low prices and cute clothes. I am a convert for life

Love,
me

Dear everyone,
Who has two thumbs and got promoted after only being in her job for six months and got a nice little pay raise???

THIS GUY.

Love,
me

2005-06-03T10:43:00.000-07:00

Highlight of my day: Finding Chex Mix in my desk. Oh Yeah.

(I am ever so lame)

I've been tagged!

2005-06-01T22:28:00.000-07:00

via burning paper

Total Volume Of Music Files On My Computer: 34.21GB. Please keep in mind that this is R's and my combined music. That being said, 23.3GB is mine. I have A LOT of Pearl Jam that I don't listen to. Seriously, if you're jonesing for a Pearl Jam album, I probably have it.

The Last CD I Bought Was: Rockin in the Suburbs by Ben Folds.

Favorite song from the album (er, CD)? I still haven't listened to the whole thing, but so far, "Annie Waits" is my favorite. I like how it starts out with the strong piano chords.

Song Playing Right Now: Uhh... Law and Order?

Five Songs That I Listen To A Lot (Or That Mean A Lot To Me):

In no particular order:

1. "Jolene" by Cake. This was the only song, out of the entire orgy of music that was our four day drive accross the country, that really grabbed me. Also, I really dig the horns in the beginning, it sounds kind of mournful. And then in the middle it breaks out into 70's style porno music. Hot.

2. "Joyful Girl" by Ani DiFranco. Because I am a joyful girl.

3. "Walk on the Ocean" by Toad the Wet Sprocket. One of those songs that I'm always listening to.

4. "Debaser" by The Pixies. I dunno, I just really like it. Another one of those songs that I'm always coming back to.

5. "Y Control" by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. I found this song when I was at a real low point in my life. I love the line, "I wish I could buy back the woman you stole." That and it's just really pretty, it makes me feel like I'm in a movie when I listen to it.

Tagged: Samantha, Maggi, Mo, and Kyle.

2005-06-01T12:40:00.000-07:00

Dear JCPenney,

When did your clothes start getting so fashionable? I mean, granted, there are still a few duds here and there, some Grandma-wear, if you will. But some things are really really cute! And cheap! This whole you having cheap cute clothing is the best part! I swear, as soon as I get some money rustled up, you and I are going to have a bit of a pow wow. Deal?

Deal.
Please don't disappoint me,
me

Dear iTunes,

Why are you so crappy in your crappy appleness? Huh? Huh? My iPod is right there! right. there. RECOGNIZE FOOL!!

I don't know what I ever did to piss you off, but all I want to do is put more music on my iPod. That's it! So would you please, PLEASE acknowledge my iPod's presence when it's plugged into my computer? Please?

Please?
me

So much to say (picture heavy)

2005-06-01T10:37:00.000-07:00

Dear Manley Sweater,

Why you are Manley, aren't you? Ever so Manley. I have fallen in love with your drape, with your feel. I know I screwed up when I twisted a few stitches, and I may have even fallen out of pattern and not noticed it until I was six more inches up the back, but you are still my pride and joy. I know you are only half whole, but I'm working on it! I could never forget you!

See:

I've already begun to make you whole!

Also, could we please talk about this:

My feeble mind cannot quite grasp how to bring the yarn over from one finished shoulder to the unfinished shoulder. I'm sure it's simple, but apparantly I am dimwitted today.

Now we both know that I've been knitting my father's scarf on the side.

It was agreed upon! There's no need to get jealous!

What? What's what? What's this?

This is nothing! It's most definitely NOT Regia self striping sock yarn! NO! I would never dream of casting on another project while you're still in the works!

Baby.... baby don't be like this. You know I love you. Who loves you?

Love,
me

For Samantha.

2005-05-30T12:28:00.000-07:00

We missed you, dude.

Ho Hum.

2005-05-22T14:00:00.000-07:00

So yesterday R and I participated in Seattle Works! day, where we went to a park to pull some non-indiginous plant life (Ivy and Garlic-Mustard). It was fun, and a nice opportunity to meet some people (Phil's friends are fabulous! [say that five times fast]). After the volunteer work, there was an afterparty down on South Lake Union with all the free food and beer a person could ask for! R and I ended up being pretty drunk by the time we went home, and consequently we slept from 5-8. Then we watched a movie and had some "quality time," and then went BACK TO SLEEP from ELEVEN PM TO TWELVE PM. (Totally ridiculous people!)

Now I'm bored at home, since R left to go do his roleplaying thing. I wish he didn't decide to hang out with people on Sundays. I always thought of Sundays as "our day". We would just lay around, or do the food shopping or laundry or whatever. Although I would probably feel the same if he were away for a huge chunk of time on any given day because the thought of being left to my own devices for four to five hours leaves me incredibly anxious. This is the first time that I've been left alone since I got a job that I didn't have plans for. (Well I had plans, but they fell through.)

I took it upon myself to make new plans though. Woot for a drinking lunch! That makes it three days in a row, people!

2005-05-11T13:40:00.000-07:00

I'm just having one of those crappy days.

I guess everyday can't be sunshine and flowers.

We must talk!

2005-05-09T21:43:00.000-07:00

The first thing I would like to tell you about, is the FANTABULOUS Moby concert that R and I attended last Wednesday. Have I mentioned it was fabulous? And, also, fantastic?

Now, in the past, I never really gave Moby a chance. I always equated him with techno, which I was never really into. But I've converted. This concert was... well, I can't really say that it was fantastic again, now can I? That would just be a little redundent. Let's just day that I liked it a lot. Let's also say that I now have an Eggers-like crush on Moby. At some points he's wholly unattractive, but he just has it. I dunno, when he sings all deep-like... well... umm... maybe I should stop here...

He reminded me of a preacher. He would jump around on stage and sing his positive songs espousing love and peace and shouting to everyone that we should "hold onto people, they're slipping away..." (man, I hate when people do that, I didn't really just do that, did I?) And at the end, he played "Feeling so Real" and we all jumped around and waved our arms in the air, and... just... MAN!. Dude, if there were a church of Moby, I'd totally sign up. As long as I could still eat meat.

Also, Samantha had her "I've been in Seattle for two years, WOO!" party on Saturday night, and man. For some reason I just have this feeling of overwhelming awkwardness when I think back to that party. Which, if you think about it, is rather ridiculous. I mean, isn't awkwardness supposed to go away after you're done being a teenager? I could have sworn that when you reach your mid-twenties, you stop being awkward AND you stop getting acne. Well I'm still feeling awkward sometimes (albiet not as much as my teen years) AND I still get f*cking acne. what the hell is up with that??

Sunday made up for all the awkwardness though. And even though I had to go to work for four hours, I still got some good lovin time with R. (read: we did it. a lot.)

Today though, today was full of ups and downs! I spilled my coffee on my keyboard, but I finished a work project and felt very accomplished. I had a crappy dentist appointment where she poked and prodded my gums (I swear, the smell of lavander makes me tense up now, because they put those scented heated things on your neck while you're getting your dental work done), but R made sugar cookies and we got pizza. So yeah, it was totally a schizophrenic day!

2005-05-06T14:44:00.000-07:00

Everyone else was updating. I felt like I should too!

Tactile

2005-05-03T12:31:00.000-07:00

Lately I've been feeling very tactile. I've noticed that things that I can produce with my own hands are the things that I prefer doing. Case in point: R and I just got a typewriter, and we are enamored. Using the typewirter is so very satisfying. You get to hear the clickity-clack of the keys, and when you've finished writing a page, you can lift it out of the carriage and viola! A page! A sheet of paper that I can touch and feel and look at, with the words that have just come from my head. R and I have taken to writing tag team stories on it. The latest is a love story about Joe, Sylvia, and a very hungry bear. I'm turning over an idea in my head about a depressed hot air balloon operator. As Samantha would say, "There are just somethings that I can't say to my computer or a peice of paper that I can say to my typewriter." It is fabulous.

Also, making things has become a big deal. As you all know, I've taken up knitting. But lately it's become something more meaningful. The fact that I can clothe the people I love out of something that has come from my hands is amazing. It is the perfect act of love. Here, are you cold? Let me keep you warm. Same goes with cooking. I've become fascinated with the idea of making my own bread, for symbolic as well as practical reasons. Here, are you hungry? Let me feed you.

Jerk

2005-04-30T13:26:00.000-07:00

Lame:
homer.blogspot.com
marge.blogspot.com
lisa.blogspot.com
maggi.blogspot.com
bart.blogspot.com
drfrink.blogspot.com
doh.blogspot.com
monorail.com

Less lame:
glaven.blogspot.com
goodmorningstarshime.blogspot.com
monodoh.blogspot.com
angrygrunt.blogspot.com
angrygroan.blogspot.com

Maggi's (and the best suggestions EVAR):
iamsosmarts-m-r-t.blogspot.com
snakesarenaturesquitters.blogspot.com
kwikeemart.blogspot.com
flanderssucks.blogspot.com
timmyotoolefelldownthewell.blogspot.com
leftorium.blogspot.com
monkeyknifefight.blogspot.com
internationalwaters.blogspot.com

Really reaching:
andillneverhavethatrecipieagain.blogspot.com
andillneverhavethatrecipieagainohno.blogspot.com

2005-04-29T08:56:00.000-07:00

What is it about dark rainy days that draws me to the warm cacoon of my bed? Makes me want to burrow into that warmth as I snuggle with the warm body at my side? Draws me to creature comforts? There's nothing I'd rather be doing today than snuggling in bed with my man. Perhaps peppered with some knitting, eighties movies and a good book.

2005-04-28T10:33:00.000-07:00

My homies,

Seriously, an awesome post is coming soon! Filled with stories and pictures beyond your wildest dreams! Seriously! It's a brewin!

Dooce,

I had a weird dream about you last night. A dream where your house got made over Extreme Makeover: Home Edition style, and all of your Utah friends and neighbors got together to do this wonderful thing for you. And they built, like, five REALLY tall crosses on your roof, church-style. The really weird thing? You LOVED it! Jon LOVED it! Leta was all excited and bouncy by it!

It was just... disturbing.

2005-04-18T21:12:00.000-07:00

I am so one of the cool kids now.

OWW!!!

2005-04-16T18:15:00.000-07:00

I burned my thumb today. If you look at the picture below you can see the blister.

I've learned something about myself today. And that is that I'm a big baby when it comes to burny fingery pain.

2005-04-13T09:07:00.000-07:00

Dear Vintage Knits,

Why, oh why would you put a picture in your book of someone wearing a crappy sweater in their underwear? I see what you're doing! All trying to sex up bad sweaters and knitting in general, but guess what, I'm probably NOT going to wear that in my underwear guys. Well maybe, but I would probably want to wear it to work too (and I'm not going to work in my underwear, no matter how much you paid me) so really, wouldn't it be better to see it paired with a respectible pair of grey slacks? Oh. I get it. If it were paired with something people would actually wear, they'd see how crappy it is.

I'm on to your game.

Dear knitting fad,

It is time for you to stop being a fad, k? It makes me feel all icky inside to see poncho kits at my Local yarn store, and I die a little when I see that bikini kit in Target. Let's all just take a step back and fade into obscurity a bit.

Dear dude at the bus stop two days ago,

I do not give two craps about your Mac, your classes, or the random people you meet on the bus. In case you hadn't noticed, my grunts and one syllable replies indicated that I had no desire to continue that conversation. Yet still, you soldiered on, undeterred. In a way I guess I admire your tenacity, but still. Leave me alone.

Respectfully,
me

2005-04-07T10:44:00.000-07:00

OMGNEWKNITTY

An Ode to Wawa, well, not really an Ode.

2005-04-06T11:53:00.000-07:00

Dear Wawa,
You were the one store I knew I would miss when I moved. Your breakfast sandwiches were the only thing that made the long trek between Lancaster and Philadelphia worth it at 5:30 in the morning. So delicious were your bacon and egg muffins with an orange juice, and your array of freshly baked muffins came second only to Dunkin Donuts. Your coffee! OH! Your coffee was to die for! I may have moved to the coffee capital of the country, but your brew will always hold a special place in my heart! It was always just right, not too mild, yet not too strong either.

You never put on airs. You always catered to the average joe, with a nice cup of brew, a hoagie (Oh carolina turkey hoagie! How I miss thee!), and a steaming cup of soup. There was always something for everyone on your menu, be it rice bowls or meatballs.

I think what I'm trying to say, dear Wawa, is that I never fully appreciated your bounty when you were just around the corner. And I promise you, that when I return to the East Coast I will never take advantage of you ever again.

Love, with all my heart,
me

But if I had to walk the world, I'd make you fall for me...

2005-04-01T14:53:00.000-08:00

This song was stuck in my head all day. Why? you ask? That's because last night was EIGHTIES night at Neighbors!! Sadly, now I can't even think of the tune of this song, as I wrote the title to this entry down hours ago. But back to Eighties night fun! There's nothing like getting dressed up with the girls and going out for a little drinkin and booty shakin. (Well actually, you don't really "shake your booty" to eighties music. It's more like a lot of jumping around and looking like a shmo.) Apparantly, Samantha and Cat have decided to attend weekly. I'm not sure I'm down with that, as it's not really R's scene and I would feel bad ditching him every Thursday night, but biweekly is good!

Unrelated, I should not be allowed access to ebay when I'm bored at work. Because then I go and buy something like this. SO CUTE. But totally unneccessary. Buying these is also annoying because the budget goes into effect today and I kind of screwed myself for the month. I'm so retarded some days.

(but they're SO. CUTE. So I guess it's worth it.)

New Hair!

2005-03-30T07:38:00.000-08:00

Yes everyone, I have new hair. It isn't really that new as I usually get my hair cut this way, and when I color it, this is the color I use. So it really isn't anything different, but I like it. It's nice to be back to normal. I'm thinking about growing out my hair like Willow's on the last season of Buffy (Please excuse the Buffy references, R and I just finished watching the seventh season. I know I know, we are *those* people) Really long with shorter layers framing the face. I think that would work for me. Now I just need to go about growing my damn hair. Stupid hair all not growing quickly enough.

Maggi brought up an interesting scenario today. What if I won the lottery and spent all the money on yarn? COULD YOU IMAGINE ALL THE YARN!?!??! Granted, if I won the lottery I would probably be a little more responsible then spending all of it on yarn, but a girl can dream, right?

Sweater progress: Tonight I shall be working in the new color to R's sweater. *is so excited* I shall be taking pictures of it before I start mixing it with the red, and then after I mix it with the red, so that you may all see my progress and my awesome fashion sense in mixing these two colors. Yes. I rule.

2005-03-25T14:49:00.000-08:00

There's nothing like rockin out to some Bon Jovi at work when you're feelin like crap!

*loud and out of tune* WHOOOOOOOOA We're half way the-ere! WWWHOOOAAAAAAAAA! Livin on a pray-er!!!

*rocks out*

Blue

2005-03-25T08:38:00.000-08:00

Why is it that whenever I lay in bed in the morning and think to myself "I'm totally taking today off," I lay there five minutes later and think of at least one stupid, pressing thing that MUST be completed that day? Long story short? I wanted to take today off, but can't because I have to enter yesterday's time and today is the last day of the billing cycle. *grumble grumble*

Samantha's melancholy seems to be catching, as I find myself afflicted. R asked me last night what was wrong, because I had that spacy, sad look on my face that I get whenever I'm feeling blue. Of course I replied with my usual "nothing, just tired" (I was tired, just also blue) because I never like admitting to being down. I feel like I could just burst into tears at the mere admission to it. le sigh.

updates! updates! tralalala updates!

2005-03-24T11:59:00.000-08:00

- The visit from R's parents went really well! R dragged them everywhere that was worth seeing, we went out for some FANTASTIC dinners, and I got my ass handed to me in rummy. A good time had by all!

- Went to Samantha's last night. I've missed her. Normally we hang out on the weekends, but last week R's parents were here so no drinking fun with our drinking buddy. :o( I brought her flowers and ice cream, cause she's been down lately, and lo! Her and Cat were in the midst of making brownies! Nothing goes better with brownies than ice cream! I must have a little psychic in me. ;o) We watches Saved! which was a good movie, made plans to go out danceing next Thursday (Neighbors, anyone?), and talked about boys. I love listening to single girls' boy drama. I don't have any drama going on in my life. My job is going well, my boyfriend is awesome and I'm generally happy, so if all I can get is second-hand drama, I'm takin it!

- There was a fire in my building last night. R and I are sitting around, watching CSI, minding our own business, and all of a sudden our smoke detector goes off. It takes us a couple of minutes to realize that the alarm is going off building wide, and that we should hightail it out of there. R put on pants and I grabbed the cat (as she was running for cover) and we fled out of there. Poor Tippi,she was so scared. The alarm was SO. LOUD. as we were leaving the building that I could feel her claws digging into me as she shivered. It probably was just a grease fire, cause after standing outside for about ten minutes, the firemen waved us in.

- I've started R's sweater (picture pending). It looks really nice so far. It's kind of a bitch, cause I've never made anything with so many stitches in a row, but I'm persevering. I have about four inches done so far (20 rows @97 sts per row= 1940 sts!!). four and a half more inches and I get to move on to a new color! Yay!

Communique

2005-03-22T14:23:00.000-08:00

To: ~eve~
From: Phaedre
11:02AM

Let it be known to all the land, I have been officially reprimanded for the wearing of jeans on a non-jeans wearing day. Go, henceforth, and proclaim the shamefulness to all you meet!!

To: Phaedre
From: ~eve~
12:06PM

Shame! Shame! Shame! Shame!

You are a vile creature.

To: ~eve~
From: Phaedre
01:50PM

Lo! Let no pure creature cast an innocent gaze upon the legs of the vile beast who walketh in denim like a plague upon the earth! Oh Lord! Why hast thou sent this demon among us to defile thine holy dress code? Oh Lord! Give us the strength to resist the evil that this foul button-fly bringeth to your most faithful of khaki-clad worshipers! Deliver us from the loose, immoral ways of the casual dresser, and unto your divine temple of khaki!

2005-03-18T12:27:00.000-08:00

Dear Allergies,

Calm the fuck down!

Thank you.
me

You know you're hormonal when...

2005-03-15T11:30:00.000-08:00

You're laying on your boyfriends chest watching that episode of the Simpsons where Lisa has the substitute teacher she really connects with, and your boyfriend, feeling a wet spot on his chest, asks you "dude, are you crying?"

2005-03-14T21:36:00.000-08:00

I found myself sitting front of the TV tonight, watching Pieces of April and getting all weepy while I shoved shredded pizza cheese in my mouth. R is currently tweaking the Playstation so that I can watch Love Actually (And cry the whole way through, because it is just. so. beautiful.) I don't think it will work, but I love him for his effort.

I've been avoiding you, but don't take it personally. I haven't had much to say, except I miss you guys (you know who you are)

ps. I stole this from Maggi. I don't think she'll mind.

2005-03-09T08:23:00.000-08:00

Dear Guy on the number 8 bus who took up the whole seat,

You are a fucking asshole. Sure, at the time no one needed to use that seet, but the impertinence and general jerkiness of it just really ticked me off.

Way to be an asshole, buddy.

2005-03-04T08:22:00.000-08:00

I was told I need to post less depressing things on my blog.

2005-03-03T11:30:00.000-08:00

So sad.

Checked out

2005-03-01T16:14:00.000-08:00

My brain went on vacation about two hours ago. Which really sucks considering I have things I NEED to accomplish before I leave work. Stupid little detail-oriented things. I am so very very tired. Last night I worked until 8pm, and this morning I got in at 7am and now I can't look at anything work oriented because I just want to chuck it across the room. So I'm doing what any normal person would do in the situation when they can't concentrate and aren't able to nap: eat.

Crackers. Oh so delicious crackers.
....
Yesterday, as I was rotting away at work, I kept looking at the clock. At 6:30 I'm saying to myself, "I'm not staying past 7" and then 7 rolls around and I'm still not done things I need to do. So I finish them around 7:15 and call R for a ride home, totally annoyed at life and work and everything. Sadly, R wasn't there. This left me very very confused, because where could he possibly be?!? So, I left a message and stick around for a bit longer, thinking "Maybe he's doing laundry," so periodically over the next 45 minutes I'm calling the apartment, like, seven times. (I can be a wee bit obsessive when cranky. What.) FInally, 8 o'clock rolls around and I'm too fed up to even consider staying any longer. I can read the writing on the wall. He's not there. This makes me angry and upset all at the same time. Upset, because what if something happened to him? (*worry worry worry*), angry because what if that bastard is doing something fun without me? So I'm sitting at the bus stop waiting, silently obsessing, calling the apartment over and over again. I finally get home around 8:30 with my headphones on, push open the door and mutter to myself. I turn around and there he is with the laundry basket.

me: Where the hell have you been? I've been calling home for the last hour or so.
R: I've been locked out of the apartment for the last two hours. I listened to your message outside the door.

I love my wonderful, intelligent R.

Birthday and Fasnacht Madness!

2005-02-25T12:31:00.000-08:00

Birthday and Fasnacht Madness!!!

This is as close as R gets to a blog, and since I'm at work and don't have access to the pictures that are up on his picture page, I figured I'd just link to it. But if I were the one who posted the pictures they would have some different captions.

Picture #1 - Steph. Unhappy about Potato Duty "Get that fucking camera out of my face" is what this picture screams.

Picture #2 - Fasnachtamantha, flouring up some dough.

Picture #3 - "Who knew such little dough would make so many doughnuts!! BUH!!"

Picture #4 - Golden Delicious Doughnughty (Fasnachty) Goodness.

Picture #5 - Golden Delicious Doughnughty (Fasnachty) Goodness part duex.

Picture #6 - Fasnachtamantha frying up some Golden Delicious Doughnughty (Fasnachty) Goodness.

Picture #7 - Birthday Booty!! The darling R gave me the iPod, and the Interpol CD (warm gushy mushy lovey feelings go out to R). My Dude, Fasnachtamantha hooked my up with the green Beijo Vegas bag, and I hooked myself up with the green Beijo slap wrist watch, dangly earrings, and punk rock silver bracelet. Does anyone else notice a pattern?

Picture #8 - Slap Watch! In action! (Pay no attention to Steph's hair, which needs to be dyed in THE WORST WAY)

Picture #9 - Slap Watch! Post Action!

May I mention that I feel so very cool today, wearing my favorite Gap top, with my coordinating green accessories and hot Franco Sarto Sandles. I don't think I've ever felt this pulled together.

2005-02-24T09:31:00.000-08:00

First and foremost, I would like to wish myself the most rockinest birthday ever. I don't know how this will happen, as we are now in Trial Mode at the office and have to work this weekend, but I'm sure I'll find a way. I'm resourceful like that. ;o) (purses! jewelry! tonight! woo! I swear I won't bail on you tonight, I swear, I swear!) Oh, and thank you my darling for the lovely birthday wishes!

Now the real entry may commence.

Yesterday I got my Shimmer yarn from Knit picks. I am so very excited about it and it's lace weightiness! I don't know what the hell I'm going to make with it, but I did find a pattern that I liked. I guess I'm just going to have to buy another knitting book! Oh darn!

My favoritest black shoes crapped out on me this morning. These black shoes have been one of my staples since my sophomore year of college (five years) and now they're gone. done. kaput. So this weekend, along with getting myself a new pair of black pants (damn you old navy! What the hell makes you think it's ok to put side pockets on "at waist" pants?!? It just makes those of us with hips look retarded. Assholes.), I will also be heading over to payless (or the Nordstrom rack, I haven't decided yet) to buy a cheap pair of black shoes that will last until I can afford a pair of comfy Danskos. (or these! or these!)

Side note about The Rack: Every time I go to the shoe department there, I feel like a little kid in her mom's closet.

Finally, my birthday presents from R have not come yet. I am so very very sad. Oh, and screw you Amazon, for cutting the price of the one thing by seventy dollars. ON MY BIRTHDAY. Assholes.

2005-02-15T16:09:00.000-08:00

Everytime I see "County of Multnomah" I think "County of Menomenuh"

There is something wrong with me.

Comraderie

2005-02-15T15:55:00.000-08:00

At the freezing cold bus stop this morning, I had the following conversation with a fellow bus rider, who just happened to be wearing a Santa hat:

Me: Still in the Christmas Spirit, eh?
Him: Yeah, Unfortunatly I can't find another hat that's as warm as this one. I mean, I know why they wear this kind of hat at the North Pole. (har har)
Me: haha, yeah.
Him: I mean, hats with ear flaps are also warm. But I can't wear one of those, I'd just feel silly.

ba dum ching! Good night everybody! I'm here all week!

No, he actually said that to me. I couldn't come up with something as silly if I tried. Then the conversation got into the weird territory:

Him: teeth chattering It also doesn't help that I ripped my pants, ya know, in the crotch...
Me: Umm.. Yeah.. That must be cold...

Dude, what makes you think I want to know that you're freezing your nads off? I mean, I know we're both shivering at the bus stop, but, um, TMI.

On a bit of a side note, the word crotch has got to be the most unsexy word ever. I was looking at lingere on Amazon (that in itself is just weird) and I found an "Open Bust Open Crotch Fishnet Bodystocking" I don't know about you, but the word "crotch" just ruined it for me. Now it just reminds me of R's old fish.

Dude

2005-02-14T21:10:00.000-08:00

You wish you had shoes as cool as these. And as pink. I was walking around the office today and one of our attorneys actually complimented me on them. Well he said they were awfully bright, which I totally took as a compliment. All the girls fawned over them, one of the paralegals said that Maggi would totally appreciate them, and I was sad for a moment. But how can one stay sad when they're wearing BRIGHT FUCKING PINK SHOES??!?!?!?

SO. FUCKING. COOL.

PINK SHOES!!

2005-02-14T08:06:00.000-08:00

[Picture pending, as I'm writing this at work]

PINK SHOES!!! Because if you can't wear pink shoes on VD Day, when can you wear pink shoes?!?! Just kidding. I just really really love them and would be wearing them no matter what. Samantha and I went shoe shopping yesterday, and I came back with two of the most impractical, whimsical shoes I could find. Bright fucking pink shoes and red Franco Sarto Sandles (totally impractical as it is still winter), I'm so excited about them!!! *squeeeeee*

The Interpol Concert was great! We got some drinks beforehand and just sat around really enjoying each other's company. We hadn't been able to do that in awhile and it was nice. Interpol was gorgeous. Listening to them live has now spoiled me. And it isn't like they were great showmen, it's just that they sounded so so much prettier in person then they do on their album. Which is no small feat considering the album is fucking amazing.

Dinner last night was awesome. R and I sat in this fancy seafood joint (where, incidentally, we both got steak) pretending to be sophisticated and talked about important world topics, like, why the US never referred to itself as the homeland until after 9/11. Getting ready for dinner was half the fun, I wore awesome shoes (that I slipped out of, but oh well), a pretty skirt and va-va-voomed hair. I felt totally hot. It was awesome!

What an awesome weekend!

AWESOME!

quickie

2005-02-10T08:24:00.000-08:00

1. I joined a gym! I finally got off my duff and actually did something about feeling like crap about my body all the time. The place is really nice, bright, and friendly and I joined with a girl from work so there's a little extra motivation for me (cause ya know, I need all the motivation I can get where the Gime is concerned.)
2. I'm starting Weight Watchers on Monday! I know I know, I've had this info for how long? But it was so hard to start a diet during the holidays, and then I just kind of forgot about it. But this should be good, as long as I stick to it long enough to lose the extra weight, I'll be happy. Remember, the first bite is the best bite!
3. I quit Russian. I decided that a tutor wasn't really the way I was going to learn. Maybe if I had a tutor and a class, but the way it was was just not working out with work and whatnot. I'm kind of sad that I didn't stick with it, but in the end I didn't really like my tutor on a personal level, and I think that's really important.
3. Project of Doom 2005 has been completed. I came in on Saturday and worked a 5 hour day (on my day off!!!) and got the fucker finished. Let us all hope that ~eve~ does not have to go back and redo this peice of crap for any previous years. (hope hope hope).
4. I am very much in love with R. And this is going to be one rockin Valentine's Day! No, really. He got me concert tickets for V Day! Interpol and Hot Hot Heat, here I come! Wooo!!! ROCK!!

Awkward Moment of the Day: I'm standing at the cross-walk with three other people, they all know one another, talking and laughing. I'm standing at the light, waiting for it to turn red so I can cross and realize that I probably have to go push the damn button. So just as I turn around to push the button the light turns red and everyone else crosses. Just. Awkward.

You are the ones who are the ball lickers **edit

2005-02-04T11:16:00.000-08:00

Dear Washington State Tax Auditor,

Fuck you, you fucking fuck. You are the reason I dreaded coming to work today. You are the reason, that I was wrong in thinking that I would be finished this project today, not matter how long a day it would be. You are the reason I feel totally inept at my job. You are the reason my boyfriend snapped at me when I tried to wake him up this morning. You are the reason I was crying in the bathroom. You are the reason I have infections of a delicate nature (Oh mighty triumverate of crappiness [mental crap, physical crap, emotional crap], you are a mighty foe). You are the reason my mother threw my tricycle out the window when I was three. You are the reason for world hunger and tsunami devestation. You are responsible for all the things that have ever gone wrong in my life and will ever go wrong in my life.

**edit: Oh yeah, and you are also the reason I'm taking an antibiotic that will make me vomit if I have alcohol so I can't even drown my sorrows.

Fuck you, you jerk.

2005-02-02T08:20:00.000-08:00

Reasons why this week sucks:
-- Infections. Of the Delicate Nature. Two. Out of respect to my readers, I won't tell you what kind they are, but I will say that the treatments for them are somewhat... messy. That's all I'll say. (even though I really want to bitch about it up, down and all over the place.)
--waking up at seven-thirty and rushing out the door
--Staying late at work every day.
--Gettng to bed too late.
--Complaining that we're out past nine, and feeling really old about it.
--Scary drunk guy coming on to me in Pioneer Square. This one needs some elaborating. R, Samantha and I were walking home from the bookstore last night, when some Lecherous Drunk Guy starts talking:
LDG: "Excuse me, you dropped something!"
me: "Did I drop something?" (dude totally played on my insecurity that I'm CONSTANTLY dropping things. Even though I don't)
LDG: "Yeah, you dropped my heart. Can I buy you a drink?" By this point he's leaning in to me and I can smell the liquor on his breath.
me: "No"
LDG: "Can I buy you a car?" Leaning closer...
me: Stepping back "No"
LDG: "I'll fly you down to Miami" Leaning closer....
me: Stepping back "No thanks"
LDG: "Then I guess the cruise is out" Leaning in,
me: Dear God I think this scary drunk man is going to try to kiss me! How do I get out of this?? CRAP CRAP CRAP!!
R (my Knight in Shining Armor): Yeah, we gotta get going.

Reasons why this week is not so bad:
--Seeing Douglas Coupland at Elliott Bay (the man is really f'n funny)
--Watching Samantha Gid out over talking to Douglas Coupland. (whoa, way to verb those adverbs there. R is such a bad influence.)
--Buying a new book (*squee!!!*)
--Eating pizza at Romios at ten o'clock at night.

On a completely different note, I've been noticing people's shoes a lot lately, and it makes me sad about my own rather pathetic collection. Today I saw a girl wearing purple flats with a bow (purple! bows!). This is also the same girl that I've seen before that carries the really cute bag that I've been trying to catch a glimpse of the brand. But it's so small that I can't see it. Anyways, what I'm really trying to say is that when I get more closet space I am SO buying shoes. SHOES!!!!!

2005-02-01T08:26:00.000-08:00

I woke up this morning with a severe case of the "dontwanna"s. Normally I get up at the asscrack of dawn, shower, get dressed, putz around. Not today, dear readers. Today I woke up at seven-thirty (seven-thirty!), after over an hour of hitting the snooze alarm. And had twenty minutes to get dressed, putz around and get my food ready for lunch. What was I laying in bed thinking about? Well, mostly it was me thinking about calling out of work for the day. It would have been so cool! I would have gone back to sleep and then I could have done the laundry and picked up my perscription....

It could have been glorious.

But no. My (and my boyfriend's) sense of duty hauled my ass into work today.

I shake my fist at it.

Jolene.

2005-01-28T08:48:00.000-08:00

Driving thorugh the vastness of South Dakota, a whole lot of nothing spread around for miles upon miles. You could see rain clouds far off in the distance, and it wasn't until this trip that I was able to actually see that they were rain clouds. Back home, or I should say, back in Pennsylvania, the terrain is so hilly, the area so congested with buildings, you could never really see the sky or see off in the distance. There was always something in the way. But out here there was a whole lot of nothing around. There was this sort of quiet beauty surrounding the area. I found myself bored by it.

We amused ourselves by spotting Wall Drug and Corn Palace signs and singing loudly in the car.
It had been a seemingly long time since I had been struck by a song. In that car, on that cross country roadtrip, I had become numb to all music as we had been listening to it nonstop for hours upon hours on end. Friends of ours had made us CD's with awesome music that I could no longer appreciate because it was all just this one big buzzing in my head anymore.

There was only one song out of that entire group that grabbed me like this did. The straining guitar chords at the beginning, the ambiguous lyrics, all added up to this immense feeling. I was stirred.

Now that song reminds me of you during that drive, singing backup (PULL!! GET DOWN!!!) in the car, and later dancing in that seedy motel room in Nowhere, South Dakota.

2005-01-25T15:59:00.000-08:00

I got this from R in response to an email I sent him complaining about how tired I am/was. I nearly fell out of my chair when I read it.

I drank three cups of coffee to fix that! Now I'm listening to fast technoand bobbing my leg at crazy speeds!! And I have to pee!!!

It's great great great!!!!

Exclamation!!!!!!!!!11!!!!one!!!1!

Weather related...

2005-01-22T14:13:00.000-08:00

Dear East Coast,
Good luck with all the snow, suckers.

Dear Heather,
I almost feel kind of bad that you moved over to the East side, only to be pummled with eight to twelve inches of snow. Sure it's a novelty now, but you'll see what a pain in the ass it is. (sucker)

Dear Seattle,
I heart your sixty degree weather. I heart it good.

~eve~

Letters, unsent

2005-01-22T13:43:00.000-08:00

Dear Bloggers,
It was lovely meeting you at the meetup. You are all unfathomably cool. I left the meetup mentally depleted and socially satiated. Thanks.

Dear Belly Dancer,
Thank you so much for hitting my boyfriend with your hip beads at the Moroccan Restaurant. He looked uncomfortable enough for me to get a kick out of it. You are quite the entertaining dancer with balls to boot. I found myself whispering to R that I could do that, but I doubt I could actually do it in front of people, as I tend to get embarrassed easily and hate to be the center of attention. Also, thank our server for us, he was awesome.

Dear Le FROCK,
I am so very, very amused by your name. Say it with me now, le FROCK. It was so very awesome of you to have a pair of Franco Sarto Maryjanes in my size. And for such an awesome price too! I do wish you had more awesome clothes in my size, but well, I'm not exactly a size six anymore (not that I ever was). I just think that's something we can work on together, k?

Dear Franco Sarto Maryjanes,
You are teh cool. You are the first pair of sexy shoes that I've bought in a very very long time. You are totally impractical, but I love you anyway.

Dear American Express,
If you are going to say "teh" instead of "the" on the address of the envelope, remind me again why I'd want your credit card? I mean you've amused me to no end, but why would I want to have credit with a company that can't spell "the" correctly.

Dear Fool,
I swear, I have your Christmas present and will mail it out to you shortly. I'm just very lazy, and for awhile there, very poor. You know I love you. Oh, and you are clearly the bigger dork. Congrats!

Dear Assorted Friends,
As we all know, my birthday is coming up, and instead of soliciting gifts through my email, I've decided to solicit gifts through my blog. I find it to be a less tacky then sending out a mass email saying "buy me stuff." Anyways, here's my wishlist, and no one is obligated, I just thought it might be helpful to some.

I heart you all,
~eve~

Tryin to one up me, eh?

2005-01-19T21:53:00.000-08:00

So my friend in Baltimore decided to one up me with her story of dorkiness. I think she may have me beat. By the way you should go read Fool, she's awesome.

So I didn't want to post this as a comment because I am not sure how long my comments can be on blogspot but I thought I'd take you up on your challenge to rival the dorkiness.

This guy that I am sorta seeing (we have gone on a couple dates) asked me to be his "accomplice spy in the land of beer related espionage" so I took him up on it.

This is the e-mail I got from him this morning:

....begin.communication...
We here at the Beer Intelligence Agency Tactical Command Headquarters are pleased that you have accepted our mission, Agent Double-Oh-Sexy. Your real mission is to gather as much information as you can about this purported beer trafficking, via personal, first-hand experience. Covert Operative G will be working with you on this mission, and will assist you with your cover. The fate of the free world rests in your hands. Good luck, and godspeed.
....end communication...

Then when it started snowing like a bitch over here on the East Coast I sent him this message:

...begin communication...
Covert Operative G - we may have to abort the mission due to possible dangerous weather and traffic conditions. Please advise. Agent 00-S
...end communication...

To which he replied:

Agent 00-S

A tactical command vehicle equipped with all manner of foul weather gear has been requisitioned for this mission. I can meet you at our pre-arranged rendezvous point on [Street name deleted to protect the innocent] at the previously scheduled time. If you are unable to reach the rendezvous point, the mission timetable is adjustable. Emphasize personal safety in your travels! The health of our agents is far more important than the mission.

-G

Now tell me that we aren't dorks!